Doni had considered the situation long and hard after Stephen had broken the news to her that she would require an escort off Refuge grounds. It hadn’t, in the end, changed her mind. It had, however, forced her to come up with a plan for addressing all the predictable reasons he could fight her on it before she told him. He’d still fight it to the last ditch, but she had a plan to deal with that, too.

In the end she was fairly sure he give in, but he'd hate it. He wasn’t Richard and she wasn’t Lily, but he was still as protective as they came, in his own way. And since she’d returned he’d wrapped her in a a degree of caring protectiveness that, as much as she loved him and understood his reasons, would drive her insane very soon if she didn’t do something about it. The house was finished, she felt fine…what was left that might be called recovery would proceed at its own pace. What he done that day in the infirmary had stopped the flashbacks, or so it seemed since there hadn’t been anymore, thank God.

But the bombing had made it clear she needed to be back and doing…doing all the things she’d done before, in the infirmary and on the teams. His attempt to slot her into a gilded cage by asking her to take over the infirmary was sweet, but transparent. It wasn’t for her, it wasn’t what she was good at. What she was good at was emergency medicine, to put it plainly, healing in the field, not in the infirmary. And she wanted it back, for a million reasons that started with her self-respect and covered a whole host of things, including the lives she could save.

Yesterday, with Tommy, she’d known that if she hadn’t been there he’d of died…it was that simple. What she’d done, what they’d done together had never been done before. It had always been like that. There was something that happened when they worked together him supplying the energy and she using it that was unlike anything any other healer she knew of even working when working with Stephen or another channeler could do.  What surprised her was that Stephen had stopped doing field work, since she knew he thrived on it, just as she did. Given the situation, though, she was willing to bet that even if she could pull it off so that she could go out with the teams, it was unlikely that Marc and Trevor would sit still for Stephen doing the same thing, at least until the insanity stopped.

Doni was grinning at the thought of what would happen if he kicked over the traces so to speak as she knocked on Trevor’s door, the outer office being currently unoccupied. “Hi, got a minute?”

Trevor stood, smiling at her. "Surely. Come in. You look much better than the last time I saw you. What can I do for you?"

"So do you, I must say."  Doni closed his door as she entered and took the seat he waved at.  "As for what you can do...that is exactly my question.  I want to know what can be done to work it out...security wise....so I can go back to work on the teams, like I used to do."

Trevor opened his mouth and shut it again without having said a word. No sense pointing out that Stephen would have a cow. Doni knew that.   "You are requesting to be put on the normal rota? Or onto the backup cadre for emergencies?" was what he finally asked.

"Yep, for when they want a healer in the field.  Like before.  Though I sometimes filled in on the regular schedule."  She answered him like she couldn't possibly imagine there'd be a problem with the idea...at least not a problem worth mentioning.

"Right. I'll have a word with Cal and Cassidy and make sure we're informed of your schedule and any changes to it. I'll look forward to my future chat with Stephen," he added, lips twitching to try to form a smile.

"So that's it?  Nothing special?  That's what I can tell Stephen?  Trevor, I could kiss you!"  Doni enthused.

"Well, I'm not saying there might not be extra security along for you, but I don't see where we can't accommodate you as much as possible.  If I still have a job after you chat with Stephen, at any rate," he added, eyes twinkling.

She laughed, shaking her head.  "Why wouldn't you?  He's smarter than that.  He'll want you around to commiserate with."

Trevor grinned. "I'd best lay in more liquor then. Off you go. Good luck with convincing Stephen."

"I'm pleasantly surprised it was this easy to convince you," she said with a laugh that made her eyes sparkle.

"You'll have to have a chat with Maggie. You'd understand then."

"Bring her to the housewarming and I will.  I enjoyed meeting her at Hoolihan's."  Doni said as she rose to leave.  "Have her bring the baby.  It might be useful."

Trevor laughed out loud.  "Poor Stephen. I lost this argument utterly, so I can empathize with him.. The only good side is the make up sex afterwards."

"Yes, well, I'll be sure to tell him you said so."  Doni assured him laughing at the image.

He watched her walk out of his office, her own swagger returned. In all, he thought, despite the additional work for him, it was a good thing.

Doni considered her options and opted for now, not later, since that meant they could argue in his office and settle it at home. She detoured by the dining room and grabbed coffee for them both then headed over to his office. Tommy was back at his post, working diligently and looking happy again.

“How are you doing, Tommy?” She asked as she walked in, eyeing him critically, probing unobtrusively, doctor to patient, before nodding to herself, satisfied that he wasn’t back at work too soon.

“Oh, hi.” Tommy jumped up. “I didn’t hear you come in. I, uhm, I’m fine. Feel great.”

She smiled reassuringly. “Good, I’m glad to hear it. Just don’t over do it for a while, okay? I’ll make sure Stephen keeps an eye on you.”

Tommy blushed. “No, really, you don’t need to bother him. I’m fine, honest.”

She just smiled and asked “Is he free? Can I go in?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Tommy nodded. He waited until she’d she was gone before sinking, suddenly exhausted, back into his chair.

Doni gave her mate a sunny smile as she handed him the coffee, taking a seat across from him.

“Thanks, you must have read my mind.” Stephen said, sipping gratefully.

“My pleasure. You busy, am I interrupting anything?”

“Nothing that can’t wait. It’s nice to see you.” His eyes made it clear he meant it.

She upped the wattage on her smile from sunny to brilliant and set her mug in his desk. “I’m glad, but it’s possible you might change your mind in a minute. I came by because I wanted to talk to you…about working on the teams.”

Stephen added his mug to the collection on the desk and leaned back in his chair waiting for her to go on.

“I want to go back to work, Stephen. And Trevor says the security end is manageable, that he can add an extra body guard or something when I go out.” She made her voice all business.

“Doni, I…Doni, I’d really be a lot happier if you waited to do this, until it’s safe again…or least as safe as the teams ever are.”

She nodded and asked pensively, “You know, I’ve been wondering, just today in fact, why you don’t do field work anymore. What happened?”

The abrupt change in topic threw him off balance for a moment. Then he gave the question some thought. “I don’t really know. I suppose it was because there was never time and now, well...Marc’d kill me for a start and for the time being we have enough people so I don’t need to and there are other things, equally important that no one else can do, at least not easily.”

“Do you miss it?” she asked, making no attempt to hide the thrust of her questions.

“Yes, frequently. Doni, I get what you’re trying to tell me. I sympathize, but the situation right now…Damn it, Doni, you know I don’t want you to do this, you know that!” he finished, exasperated.

“I know.” Doni answered her voice level. “But I’m not Lily; I can’t just immerse myself in you in lieu of any other life because you can’t bear the thought of something happening to me or having to try to live without me. I know I couldn’t live without you and the thought of anything happening to you…and I’d still let you work the teams or anything else if your reason was good enough.”

“But you can still work…the infirmary…”

She cut in ruthlessly. “That’s not the point. And even if it was, you know that I am of more value as a healer in the field. You know that I can handle it and you know that I’m the best at it you could possibly have. You also seem to have forgotten that what we do is take calculated risks to save lives…that’s what this is, a calculated risk that we manage…that’s what you and I do or used to when we worked together. If we hadn’t been there Tommy would have died, and not because we were at the scene but because it was you and me.”

“If I let you go back out in the field then I have to send security with you, putting them in harm’s way when it isn’t necessary.”

“Weak argument, Stephen and you know it. If I leave the property, that happens. Any team on a call takes security with them and they’re in harms way.”

“I could tell Cassidy not to let you, you know that.”

She nodded. “I know it and I know you won’t, because you know you would like the result even less.”

“But at least you'd be alive.  Doni, please…Jesus, I just got you back. Why does it have to be now? Why can’t you wait?” he was almost pleading with her by the time he finished.

“Because it’s time.” She finished her coffee and stood, deciding it was also time to let him think a while. “Oh, before I go, don’t let Tommy over do it. Make him take it easy.” She walked around the desk and bent down to kiss him. “Think about it and we can talk later. I’ll see you at dinner.”

He grabbed her before she could get away. “Doni, I don’t know if I can let you,” he said softly.

“You can, the question is will you.” She kissed him again, lingeringly and then left, waving a cheery good bye to Tommy, as well as Marc and Trevor who were waiting to see Stephen.

They watched her go and headed into Stephen’s office.

"Having a tough day?" Marc commented, as he walked over to dig out the bottle he knew Stephen kept in the sideboard.  He poured Stephen a dollop and handed it to him.

"She's already visited me," Trevor offered. "You've no hope, Stephen."  Trevor took a seat off to the side.

Stephen eyed the scotch and grinned.  "Thanks."  Then he looked at Trevor and said severely, "You could have told her it wasn't doable."

"Do you think that would have been the end of it?" Trevor asked. Stephen's severe look didn't seem to have had much of an impact.

"No, but then I'd of at least been able to stall.  Now...Christ, she must have planning this for days."  Stephen shook his head and swallowed the scotch.

Marc, unshackled with an unreasonable woman (hah), sat there with a grin on his face.

"It is not funny," Stephen said with dignity.

"No of course it isn't," Marc agreed. "Considering you'd lost her for so many years, I do understand it must be hard for you."

"God, just then thought..."  He sighed.  "Any suggestions on ways to drag my feet long enough to solve the mysteries we're beset with?  Because I don't have a problem with her working the teams, my problem is with her doing it now.  Or failing that, just tell me how we're going to make sure nothing happens to her."

"She didn't seem to expect to be on the regular rota," Trevor offered. "Perhaps you can talk Cassidy into putting her on as backup or on as an extra in case the teams are overwhelmed. That way it may be months before she actually goes out into the field. I'll also have Cal alert me if she does go out, and I'll send an additional security team along with them. She needn't realize that's happening. We'll have them off out of sight, like the monitors."

Stephen grinned at him.  "Tell me, if it were Maggie, how long do you think it would take her to catch on?"

"Good point," Trevor admitted.

"So you go out with her," Marc offered.

Stephen boggled at him.

Marc shrugged. "She's gonna do it. You'll be useless if she's gone."

"What she means by working the teams is as the stand-by healer, the ones who go in with the team when we think there isn't time to get the New One back here first.  Those are generally the worst situations, and the teams are on the ground the longest because the healer has to stabilize the New One there.  If I went with her, you two would be crazed every time."  He considered the two with him, grateful for the fellow feeling.  Then he said, "The real trouble is she's right...she's the best there is at it, she can handle it and people live because she's there."  He sighed.  "I coped before, I suppose I'll cope again, but damn it...Send the extra security team, by all means, Trevor, and when she says something, send her to me."

"Oh, don't worry, I'll be delighted to do it," Trevor said with a totally understanding look in his eye.  "At least you won't have to worry about a kid along too."

Stephen had the oddest sense of déjà vu as Trevor said it and then lost the thread of it because at that moment Cassidy arrived with Melly and he turned his thoughts to business.

Once they were all settled Cassidy passed around sets of stills printed from the films Irisa had given him.  Adam had worked on them all morning, separating out the shots.

While Cassidy was doing that Stephen said, "While I'm thinking about it, Trevor, I need to spend some time at Dinah's, probably Monday.  I don't know how long I'll be."

"Right. I'll organize the protection."

"Thanks," he said and then gave the floor to Cassidy.

Cassidy explained where the film was from and what he'd had Adam do.  "The first question is does anyone recognize any of the faces.  The next is what do we want to do with these stills, if anything?

The next quarter of an hour was spent looking at each of the stills. All of them went through them. At the end of the exercise they had a small stack that one or another of them thought might hold a clue.

Then Cassidy said, "I know the media have been running the clips non stop, but what about having Irisa release the stills with a request for information, maybe have her set a hotline for calls?"

Melly nodded.  "It might work.  What I'm hearing is that public support is overwhelmingly in favor of the Listeners over this.  People are really outraged that someone would be killing teams out on calls and the attack last night has, I would guess, really inflamed it further."

"I've gotten a lot of inquiries, through Irisa, for interviews. I could take the pictures along there too. But Stephen already owes me a fortune for doing one interview he wanted to avoid. I'm not sure even he could afford me to handle the rest of the requests." Marc was looking and sounding mighty relaxed, Stephen thought.

"Believe me, I'll find a way to afford it if it means no interviews or news shows.  How you can be so sanguine about it, I'll never understand.  I'd rather take a beating."  He said the last with feeling.  "But that's also a good idea, to take the stills along."

"I'll have Irisa set it up, then.  And think of a suitable price for you to pay."

Stephen grinned, "No doubt."

Cassidy looked around the room and then said, "Any other ideas for these?"

"Just make us extra copies," Trevor said. "I'll set up a murder board and we'll start digging where and when we can. So if you learn anything Melly, forward it to me. Same for you Marc and Irisa and whoever else might have an idea. No thought on this stuff is too far out. Even if it is just a feeling you have, I'll factor it in and who knows, it might be the one thing that will lead us to these guys."

"Oh," Trevor added after a second. "I took some DNA samples from the lawn too. I'll need to check with our guys who were wounded to be sure to factor them out of things, but I'll keep what I get in the files too."

"Good.  It hadn't occurred to me, so I'm glad you thought of it."  Cassidy said.  "I've got the monitors in Ocala settled and I'm having them do preliminary reviews of all they record, looking for correlates while also uploading copies to us here, using a secure link Cal set up for me.  He's also found some crowd comparison software he's installed down there to run against the feeds, especially the more crowded ones."

"Great idea, Cassidy," Trevor commented. "These guys are gonna show up somewhere again. Too bad we don't have .. but we do. Stephen, Cassidy, the recorders from earlier missions. Do we still have that data?  We should check that old stuff too."

"Cal archives all the tapes from the monitors in the ops center for a year, plus anything else we end up with in case the Council wants it.  We started doing that, oh, about five years or so ago, in self defense.  He can give you access to all of it," Stephen said.

"Great. It will take some time, but I'd feel better if we covered all angles on this. Who knows what will turn up."

Stephen nodded.  "Trevor, where are we at with Mr. Vortees?  Anything new on him?  I understand Clem had some information for you as well, from the Vatican Bank."

"He's been careful. But I see why the minions wondered about him. I did get a note from Clem but things have been so crazy I haven't had time to get back with him. I've got a meeting with him this afternoon so we'll see where that takes us."

"I'd like to tag along if you don't mind."  Stephen said.  He hesitated before going on, "Melly and I have talked some, and Marc I mentioned it to you  the other day....the more I think about this, the more I think there's at least two agenda's here.  While one is almost certainly control of the Listeners, we need to try to figure out the other one.  Any ideas, no matter how crazy are welcome at this point."

Melly said slowly, "It seems to me that the first step needs to be to sort out what doesn't fit with a plan to control the Listeners, and to me that means the renewed attacks on the teams and the fight on the lawn."

"It does occur to me that someone might be trying to destroy Stephen, as opposed to the Listeners," Marc replied. "If I wanted him out of the way, I'd attack what he does best."

"Which would fit in with them taking Doni. Making you weaker, Stephen," Trevor added. "Could it be someone within the Listeners themselves?  Wanting you out, and wanting to install themselves in your place?"

"I've never seriously considered that as a possibility," Stephen said.  "Until now I'd have said it was as close to unthinkable as it could get.  But now, who knows.  One of the things I keep coming back to is that they didn't kill Doni and that somewhere out there are two children that were deliberately saved from the massacre at the house.  Taking those children doesn't seem to fit either scenario...controlling the Listeners or destroying me.  Keeping Doni alive only works if it was a hedged bet, a bargaining chip maybe or leverage, which might fit the control scenario but if it was to destroy me why keep her alive?"

"I can think of several reasons," Marc replied. "But then I'm far bloodier minded than you. Look, we can speculate on this until doomsday. Without more data, I'd say we're not going to get very far."

"So how do we get more data?" Cassidy asked.

Melly thought for a moment and then asked, "Has anyone gone through Bella's papers?  Or Margaret's and Maya's for that matter?  Or tried to trace the use or access of what was under the mountain you two brought down?"

Marc frowned. "I did grab as much of their paperwork as I could. At least what was in their offices. Haven't had a moment to go through it, though. Do we have anyone who has the time to devote to that?"

"We can hand it off to Ocala, I'd think and given that it's a secure facility, it's the best place to keep evidence for now," Cassidy said.  "If you have Reno get it to Jordon, we'll take it from there.  Melly, can your people start tracing the facility under the mountain?"

"Yes, I can get them on it right away."

Marc checked the time, then groaned. "I've got a press availability, as Irisa calls it, on Home, and then a meeting regarding the rebuilding of the Council facility. So if we're done here?"

As everyone was leaving Trevor turned to Stephen and said, "Good luck with Doni. Don't hang on so hard she's miserable. Besides, you'll want to turn the tables on her a time or two yourself."

"You know Trevor, that last, that's a very good point to keep in mind.  I'm pretty sure we're going to argue about it tonight and that she going to make me an offer, that she's got some compromise in mind that I'll at least be able to swallow, so if I were you I'd expect her on the schedule by Tuesday."

"Will do," Trevor said with a grin as he hurried off.

Stephen finally wrapped up the last item on his list and leaned back and stretched. Then he gathered up the stack for Tommy, whom he’d sent home a couple of hours ago and dropped it on his desk as he headed out, locking the office as he went. Ten minutes later he was walking in his front door, ready for whatever Doni had in store.

He had no plan, since he had no firm idea what her line of attack would be; only that it would probably include an offer she thought he’d be willing to accept. In the few unfilled moments since she’d left his office he’d decided that he had no real way to stop her. He might wish she was the sort who’d cater to his abject terror at the thought of losing her again, but he knew if she were that sort, she wouldn’t be who she was…the one woman he’d never stopped wanting since the first time he’d laid eyes on her, in a pleasance garden in England, the remnants of carnage creating a surrealistic backdrop, while she keened an unworldly lament for her children, drenched in their blood and weeping tears that turned pink as they dripped from her face, picked out by a spotlight shaped by the sun, the only object in the scene not in shadows or dim and dappled light.

That she was aware of his terror at the thought of losing her he had not the slightest doubt. That her terror at the idea of losing him was as great he also never questioned. But somehow she was better equipped emotionally to allow him to pursue a course that raised the specter of such a thing than he was to allow her the same freedom. Maybe it was just something women were better at than men, he didn’t know.

She waited until after they’d eaten and then cleaned up to raise the subject again, keeping their conversation on personal matters and her plans for the housewarming. He in his turn let her know they’d been invited to Dinah’s clam bake and that he would also be spending some time there on Monday and why.

Stephen opened another bottle of wine, while she finished the dishes. Then they took their glasses and settled on the terrace, the waterfall a delight to the eye and ear, watching the twilight fall and the sun set, its remaining light glinting off the pool below. Eli had already started work on the landscaping, adding annuals and shrubs for color. The scent of fresh cut grass lingered from his attention to the lawn, a task he’d finished just as Stephen had gotten home.

They knew each other so well and the intimacy they shared mentally and emotionally, so much richer with a much greater texture since they’d healed Tommy, was a constant backdrop for them both, a soft sound that played no matter what else was happening. He’d once been naïve enough to think that it meant they’d reach a point where they’d never fight or disagree, where they’d maybe never even be angry at each other. Such naiveté hadn’t lasted long and he’d since decided he was glad of it. He loved her because, among other reasons, she was real, not a cipher, and could still surprise him and delight him with new glimpses of herself, new aspects of her to explore and savor.

He studied her as she sipped her wine, her gleaming and her eyes softening as she relaxed. Her mouth was a slash of red against the tan she’d gotten the last few weeks, her lips a bit crooked and quirked a bit when she smiled, a Julia Roberts sort of smile. The line of her throat was long and elegant, shadowed by the warm brown hair she wore simply, loose to her shoulders. The neck of her tee-shirt was deeply vee’ed and revealed the lush curves of her breasts and a tempting shadowy cleavage.

She turned to him then, her smile soft and easy. “I take it you’ve taken advice on the matter?”

He chuckled and nodded. “I’ve been told there’s no use fighting it.”

They were silent for a while after that. Then he said, “Tell me the plan.”

She sipped her wine and said, “I was thinking that what I’d like to do was go back to work until I’m pregnant.”

Of all the things she could have said, that was the one he’d have bet on last. In all their time together she’d gotten pregnant once, by accident, and then lost the child…miscarrying to save Richard’s life the night he’d sent Liliana to him in the infirmary in as cold blooded and calculated a move as he’d ever made, destroying in the process any possibility of friendship between him and Richard and ensuring Richard never returned to Anne. The lost child had become the debt that tied Richard to the Refuge.

Doni had always shied away from having children, the memories of her daughters a wound that had never healed completely and her guilt a form of corrosion that would periodically erupt into the worst of their separations. After the miscarriage they’d talked a lot about children, about how they both wanted them and about whether she was ready for that. She’d kept hesitating and he’d left it alone, trusting the time would come. It would seem that it had…maybe.

“Until you’re pregnant?” he prompted softly.

“Well, I was thinking it’s time. It was one of the things I regretted when…when I didn’t know if I’d ever see you again. I’m…I’m not sure…I’m ready for…motherhood again, but I am sure that it’s time…time for babies, and even, I think, time that you made an honest woman of me.”

They’d never married, she’d always refused, always held on to that one escape clause and he’d never forced the issue, understanding at some level that the bond between them was the surety he needed while also the best way of teaching her, of giving her the room she needed to discover for herself that his commitment was unwavering, that she could trust him to not hurt her, that he was different…from her father, her husband, from all the men she’d ever known.

“You’re asking me to marry you and give you babies?” he said, the notes in his voice something that sent a quiver through her.

“Yes. “If you’ll have me?” she replied, a faint query to the last.

“If I’ll have you?” he repeated, his voice close to breaking, tossing his wine glass on the lawn and sweeping her up into his arms. “Don’t you know there’s no way I’ll ever let you go? Have you? Sweetheart, I’d kill anyone who tried to stop me.” He zapped them to the bedroom and stood holding her by the bed. His grey eyes searched her face, the joy and hope on his something almost painful to behold, bringing an ache to her throat. “Once I say yes, there’s no getting out of it…oh, God, sweetheart, so long as you’re sure…”

“I’m sure” she whispered, pulling his mouth down to hers. “I’m sure.”